Chapter Twenty Five

‘I don’t want to die…not now, not here!’

The scene around me was blurry but the sounds were crystal clear. Footsteps were accelerating and I wasn’t sure if it was mine or someone else next to me. They were pacing for sure and the path was seemingly unclear. My body was feeling the pain, a stinging pain right around my shoulder and neck. The soothing air that was passing me by gradually was turning hot as the footsteps grew in impact and came closer in terms of distance. It didn’t take long after that to realize that I was the one running forward. There was no other thought in my head but this one question.

‘Where am I running to?’

I was gripping onto something too hard, as if my life depended on it. Something was spread across my shoulders too, something thin yet solid. The clarity of the sound was also gradually growing as I ran, hinting a disaster lay ahead. Gunshots and heavy explosions were how I would characterize the sounds I heard and it meant nothing but danger and unusually, familiarity.

I knew, deep down, that I was already here. Here, as in, the place I was running to. I also knew that the place I was going to was the one place I prayed to not to go back to. In spite of knowing how I was feeling, I wasn’t able to pin point to my brain the exact place where I was leading to. My brain, without this knowledge, wasn’t able to form a clear image for me inside my head.

‘Think Aysha, think!’

I knew that I should think…however, something else wasn’t right in that statement.

The name there was Aysha. Who was this Aysha? She was very familiar though. The name rang a very clear bell in my head. It was as if I knew her as much as I knew myself. But then again, who am I?

Heat was radiating too close to me and I was sweating bullets now. My heart rate was definitely above whatever level normalcy would be defined. All that running caused me this much trouble and I was showing no signs of stopping anywhere. I constantly kept looking behind me while I felt my body cringe and dodge many a thing that I wasn’t able to see. In spite of the realization of a life threatening situation, I wasn’t stopping looking back either.

‘Rachel…I need you to keep up with me and shoot as many as possible.’

I was instructing Rachel to shoot? Why was I telling Rachel to do that? And who was Rachel anyway? I was allowing her to kill people and that was something wrong. I was acting as if I was in control of the situation that was in front of me. Only I know inside me, I didn’t like it one bit.

Though the clarity was still lacking, these words that had appeared now was pushing me through to see. It was helping me through to the much needed knowledge of where I was. And every discovery I made was much more disturbing than the previous one.

The scenery around me was nowhere close to the pleasant one I was hoping to be. Flames were blazing over every building I was aware of in my sight, the heat that had been radiating around me. The realization hit me too hard and I was partially thankful for the running that I was doing. I was hoping that I will be able to make it as far away as I can from the flaming buildings. What followed was what picked up my heart beat by a thousand more. I was running alright, but I was running towards the burning building and I was sure of what I was doing.

Why was I doing this? I was now inside one of the burning buildings and next to me came a girl equally freaked as I was. She must be Rachel. In spite of the name being too familiar, I wasn’t able to relate in my brain what she was to me. She must have been someone I knew completely or else I wouldn’t have told her what I told her next.

‘The exit is right there Rachel. We are going to make it out of here. Have faith!’

I was now seeing the world around me clear enough and now I was looking at the exit that I had told her. Then I faced Rachel, who was crouched next to me with a glimmer of hope hinting that maybe we will, after all, make it out of here. Deep inside my heart I knew that I shared the same feeling. What confused me further was why I wanted to escape this place and what this place was. With the fiery appearance and the feelings that were growing inside of me, I was definitely concluding that this place was hell on earth.

Before I could realize what had happened, we had started running. We were pacing with all our might towards the exit when I heard the deafening sounds of bullets. Someone was firing and the target was no other than me. For the way I was feeling now, I thought it was absurd but when I realized that my body was dodging them with perfect skills and agility, I knew I was doing the right thing. With the bullets flying again, I was reacting very well and one of the reactions startled me personally, thinking that I was able to do that.

When almost one of the bullets hit me, I saw my body react to it in the most unimaginable way possible. My immediate reaction was that I turned around and put a bullet right on the forehead of the shooter who had shot me before. Even at that speed I was able to keep up my accuracy. The thing that I had been gripping too tightly before was the gun that helped me shoot down my enemy.

My enemy…

I was such a person that I actually had enemies? Who am I anyway? Was that Aysha girl had to do something with whatever was happening here? Even so, why am I in this mess with her? Do I even know her? My head was spinning around in a ruthless manner.

Looking around I realized something else that freaked me out beyond words now. Rachel and I were drifting apart. She was shooting and running at the same time and the effort she took to do that had made her lose her track. She was running towards the exit without me and she was running away from me.

I was running the same way only but the tangible distance that was now coming in between us was making me uncomfortable. As far as I know and how I felt, Rachel was the only thing close to comfort, security and familiarity that I owned. It was obvious that she made me feel strong and that we shared a connection somehow so strong that this distance was disturbing me much more than I thought it would. Only to make things worse for me, things followed on.

A sudden explosion almost in front of me, threw me to my right with such impact that I was for a moment or so felt completely dead. Lying next to the rubble created by this massacre, my clarity of thought seemed to come much slow and steady. Without prior thinking because that is how this seemed like, I started to ascend the stairs that were behind me. Climbing up the stairs I was thinking now, what I was even doing walking up these stairs and then found my answer. I was going to jump out of the window that was in one of the rooms and fall into the little man made creek that adorns this abandoned asylum.

I was in an abandoned asylum? Was I here on my will and wish or what it meant to have my presence here, I had no idea.

Entering into the room now, I was gaining my thoughts clearly now. This window and the jump that followed ensured my freedom. In spite of this thought giving me a sense of relief, I was feeling immense tension and it seemed like my instinct was telling me danger hadn’t ceased of yet.

‘Not so fast, girly!’

And I was right. How I knew that freaked me out more!

I slowly turned around to find a familiar guy standing at the door, eased up and cocky, and acting like he had caught me right where he’d wanted me to be. The attitude of his wasn’t bothering me as much as how his familiarity hit me. Without my knowledge as to what was happening, the scene played out in front me.

‘Garth…you don’t want to come in here now!’ not only I knew his name; I was trying to play the bad girl’s part.

‘Why?  Will you shoot me down? Come on, you and I both know how much you are capable of. After all, I was the one trained you to become this.’

I wasn’t able to believe what happened just then, but I felt tears flow down my cheeks and it felt like I had finally let all my restrain go and broken down.

‘Why did you?’ I was pleading and my stomach was already tied up in a knot.

‘Don’t go about blaming me, missy! You were the one who wanted to become this.’

‘And get killed in the process! Not succeed in it and end up like this!’ words escaped through my controlled sobs and it seemed like I was so much pain all together, my heart felt like it was being pressed against a wall, suffocating it by doing so.

‘Now…Now…’ he started to move into the room slowly now, towards me. ‘We cannot let that happen to you now can we? You were the monster we needed to create. You were the Frankenstein that we needed to bring to life. You are the threat now that will put the future of our business in line. You don’t know about your potential. You had it in you like as if; it was in your blood. It was in your blood that you had to become…this.’

The dramatic emphasis on ‘this’ made me weep only further.

‘I am an orphan. I maybe anyone’s daughter and my parents may have been bad people. I sincerely doubt that I was so cursed that I ended up as…this! I don’t deserve this!’

‘Sheesh…you don’t know to appreciate what you have now, do you?’ he threw his arms up in dismay. ‘You are a masterpiece. Right now…you do not know pain and you do not know worry. You will not sadness anymore after this. You will rule. People will fear you and you will be above all of them.’

‘I just killed a man!

I did what?

‘An innocent man who had no idea that he was going to be killed died by my hands. I had not only exposed him but took his life. How am I above anything? I am a filthy piece of shit!’

‘You killed a traitor and you had the ability to. You are like the Almighty. You can kill. You take life as easily as you give…or at least let them have what they already have.’    

A sudden surge of rage and agony pulsed through me as soon as he stopped talking.

‘So that is how you think about yourself? That you are the Almighty? You can kill and so you can decide what happens to others? Is that why you chose to take me away from my family?!’ I was spitting my anger along with these words.

‘You had a family? I thought you were an orphan…’

‘Just because I am an orphan, doesn’t mean I got no family.’ When I said that, an elevated sense of feeling proud came into me.

 

‘Ah…but then again…you would’ve missed all the fun you had here. Maybe, it was fate that you had to be here.’

Fate…the one word I hated for some reason.

The hate had been so strong that I immediately drew the gun I held earlier and pointed it on his face.

‘Cute…’ he smirked sending more rage through me. ‘That is real cute.’

‘What you think that I won’t pull the trigger?’

‘Oh…You will pull the trigger. Only that will be last thing you’d ever do.’

‘Doesn’t matter…you’ll be dead right?’

‘Oh honey, I would be the one to have taken your life. I am the fastest draw around here baby.’

‘You want to put that comment to test?’

‘We don’t have to do this sweetie. We can talk about better things.’

‘Why are you trying to reason with me anyway?’

I was about time I asked the question. More than the question of my identity, this question had sprung up in my head causing more trouble. If I was such a bad person, bad enough to kill and I was holding a gun to his face, why does he want to take to me? Didn’t I piss him off yet?

‘You are too precious an asset to lose dear.’

‘You have to stop being cocky, Garth. I will escape. If you look around yourself, you will know that your empire is burning down to dust and it is all because of me.’

I did this too?

‘You think this one building is going to cost me my business? These girls here are already moved. Once we found your little scheme, we worked fast. You and that Rachel had what was coming for you. And for all the betraying sons of bitches that I call ‘employees’ aren’t going to stay alive another day after this.’

‘You have much more than this? Why am I not surprised?’

‘Because you already know…’ He moved a step closer to me and I held the gun firmer. ‘…and that is why I can’t let you leave.’

‘So then…try to kill me’

‘Like a set before…you are too precious an asset to lose.’

‘Bullshit.’

‘But the truth…’ he smiled looking at my misery. ‘I am sorry for this. I truly am.’

‘Yeah right…’

‘Look…I know that you are this ‘goody two shoes’ kind of a girl and you will not kill anyone even if you were asked to deep inside. But look at you now…look at you on the outside. You are every person’s nightmare.’

‘I am just nineteen years old!’

‘This is the scariest part in this horror story that you are living to show. The fact that you are just nineteen and that you are capable of this…will make even grown men wet their pants.’

As I was listening to this, I hadn’t realized that he had moved closer to me. I didn’t know how, but in a split second, he had taken the gun from me and now held me, with my back to him, his hand across my neck squeezing it. I was physically exhausted and yet I was struggling with all my might to escape his grip.

‘Trying to be naughty are we?’ he sneered and snickered while saying his comment and exhaled deeply sending chills down my spine. ‘You should’ve thought twice before holding that gun to me.’

My vision was half blinded and my breath was shallow thanks to his grip on his neck. He then spun me around and held me with my back to the wall right next to the window that held my freedom, still with his fists around my neck, holding me in place. His eyes were furious and driven and his grip sent impulses that hinted nothing but the worse. And the actions that followed only proved my thought to be right.

He moved in close, his grip still intact, and his breath as shallow as mine only to make me close my eyes in fear. The next thing that happened was the one thing I hoped I’ll never feel right now, in spite of not knowing why I was in between this mess. His cold lips landed on mine and they were kissing me with all the power Garth could muster. It wasn’t a passionate kiss but a kiss that would subdue me without further adieu. He wanted to overpower me, in every way possible physically.

The struggle against his grip grew more and the kiss kept getting stronger. He broke through my lips, penetrating it with his tongue, now trying hard to find contact with mine. His mouth reeked of tobacco and whiskey and I would’ve thrown up right then if he hadn’t let go.

‘Since day one, when I laid my eyes on you, I always wanted you for myself. Of course, you were only seventeen when you came to me but I am not too old myself. Fifteen years ain't so much of a difference now is it?’

I didn’t say a word… I was too disgusted to even think about it.

‘Brother wouldn’t let me take you. He kept saying that you were important. He also warned me that you might slit my throat.’ He smiled at his own smart remark ‘Then again, you are too hard to resist. I trained you so well mainly because I wanted you to be strong enough to take whatever I was going to do to you.’

‘Brother?’ was all that I could manage before the computer monitor on the table beamed into life, gathering both our attention.

‘Hey brother…was just speaking about you.’

The person in the computer screen gave me the very same feeling I had felt in me when I first saw Garth standing at the door. The same sense of familiarity hit me and with it came a wave of shock. I hadn’t been expecting to see this person as I never thought that these two will be brothers.

‘Sebastian?’ I breathed it as almost as a whisper, mostly because of the dismay that I was feeling.

‘Garth…get out of there, you idiot! The buildings are burning down and why aren’t you the car behind me?’

‘I had to take what was mine, bro. I got her now.’ He looked at me like he had won a prize.

‘Alright now! Get out of that place before it falls on both your heads.’

While they were doing this, I was meddling my way through Garth’s pant pocket. I knew that I was searching for something but what surprised me was that I knew for sure that will find it in him. I reached a heavy, oval object which held a circular ring on top. Holding the ring firm, I spoke out again, this time with a different attitude.

‘You want me so…is that right, Garth?’

‘Oh yeah…more than you’ll ever know. You will be the best play toy that I ever had or owned.’

‘When you trained me…what was the one thing you kept repeating? What was the one advice that you kept one drilling it through to me?’

‘You should know more about the enemy than you know about yourself’ he spoke as he smelt my neck, building his way through to my ear.

‘And did you know that I know you always had a grenade in your pocket for protecting yourself at all times?’

At the mention of the word grenade, his face moved away from my ear and was now locked with my face in shock.

‘What re you talking about? Garth! Leave already!’ Sebastian was yelling through the screen but I was unfazed.

‘And did you know that I am actually holding the pin, ready to pull it off?’

Only then did Garth realize that my hands were on him for a reason. In this moment of distraction, I pushed his hand away from my neck and kicked his chest with such ferocity, that he plummeted away from me for good. While he fell, I had simultaneously pulled the pin off the grenade giving me a mere fifteen seconds to jump out the window and hear the last words that will haunt me forever.

‘You are so dead Aysha!’

As I broke the window and fell, the grenade blew up in sync with three other bombs placed around the building, causing a hell of an explosion that accelerated my descent by a million miles per hour. As I fell however now, thoughts were filling up my head and fast that the fact that I was falling and a surge of unconditional pain through my shoulder didn’t bother me.

I was Aysha. I was responsible for everything that had happened in that building. I was Aysha and I was the monster that they’d longed to create. I wasn’t only the monster but I had let them make me into one. I had let myself become a killer and I was well on my way to hell when I was dead. In spite of knowing so much, I wasn’t ready to accept it. I knew something was wrong.

I am not Aysha. I never was as long as I can remember. I was a different person. I had no enemies in my life. Maybe a couple of bullies, but not enemies. I had loving friends. I knew that I was going to be a dancer when I grew up. I had people to care about me and I was nice to them. I was soft, lost and ambitious enough that I’d grab the first opportunity that I’d get. I had to be sure of this because I knew deep in my heart…I will not kill anyone.

I also knew that Aysha wasn’t my name.

I hit the water below as the fall finally came to an end and the cold water seemed to have brought the senses back into my body. I wasn’t breathing or swimming but I was lying straight as I felt sinking in deeper. The pain around my shoulder surged more and more and my breathing felt labored. In spite of my difficulty to breath under water, I lay still not even trying to paddle my way through to the top. Instead, I lay there, denying myself that there was no way that I could be Aysha. I was not Aysha and I knew that for sure. But what bothered me was the fact that the entire scene that had played in front of me had so much familiarity that I was lead to believe that I had to have been there at some point of my life.

But if I was not Aysha…who was I anyway? What was I actually as a person? What was my name? I knew that it was similar to Aysha…in fact; I think it is something very close to it.

With every breath being too hard to take in, I heard a voice calling my name in the distance.

‘Ayu…don’t you dare leave me!’

Ayu is my name. Ayu is who I really am. And now…I was slowly gaining my senses.

Random voices, all huddled together, came flying across my ears all at once.

‘Her pulse is pretty low… pressure is dropping…charge it again, we need to get her back… You don’t let go now child… this is not charging enough…her shoulder wound is ripping doctor…Ayu, wake up already! ...don’t worry Rocky, she is not leaving us.’

Rocky?

 Rocky…

A massive effect of electricity passed through my chest and zapped me into another dimension. I was not in the water anymore and I was coughing hard to take in all the air I needed to breathe. The pain my shoulder sky rocketed to a whole new level and tears found its way out as I opened my eyes out to face the blinding light that was in front of me.

A moment later, after a little stabilization, I came to realize that the blinding light was above me. I was lying down in the bed, with tubes going in and out of my body, surrounded by people that were curiously hoping for me to react somehow.

I found myself staring into the hopeful eyes of nine people, scattered around the bed I was in, filling up the room. There was a doctor, two nurses, and a nun who stood closer to me and a little farther away stood five people who were almost my age. I saw two girls, one looked very tough as if she knew all would be okay before hand while the other had tears in her eyes. She was held close by a guy who was visibly concerned about the situation and his expression matched with the one standing next to him. Finally, there stood a guy, a little away from them, balancing himself on the wall behind him, tears streaked all over his cheeks and holding a diary close to his chest.

Looking into the eyes of this boy made me realize that the surge of electricity had brought to me to a dimension that I never wanted to return to.

I had come back to reality.